Monday, January 04, 2010

Why Can't I Do These Dance Moves?!

Sometimes, Just Dance just annoys the hell outta me.  The Beach Boys' "I Get Around" is the hardest dance song in the whole game. I'm just pulling my hair out trying to break 10,000 points on all the songs. Just how the hell are you supposed to perform those moves so you'll score points? What the hell are you supposed to do?!  Can somebody watch this video and explain to me how exactly I'm expected to score points on what are, by all measures, easy dance moves?!

This is the frustrating thing about Just Dance. You are never told why you "miss" a move. Did I move too fast? Too hard? Do I need more momentum? Do I need to hold the Wiimote a certain way?  Do I match the beat of the song, follow the beat, or lead it?  I have no clue how to improve, aside from an annoying string of X's.

Listen, I think Just Dance is an excellent game, and I wouldn't be blogging about it if I didn't feel that way.  I'm an experienced video game critic, after all, and rooting for the underdog is my business.  But there are times when I can sympathize with the game's fierce critics among my fello gaming critics, I can feel their frustration.  When dancing to KC & the Sunshine Band or Gorillaz or The Beach Boys, I feel their frustration, too.  Thankfully, I've had enough positive experience with the game to persevere.

What's really needed are some user-generated videos on Youtube, showing you how to perform the dance moves correctly.  All of the online videos are part of Ubisoft's viral marketing campaign.  This is where I usually rely on the video games community, but they have collectively stuck their nose at this game, and any Nintendo Wii title with the dreaded "casual gamer" tag.  I'm on my own.

Oh, and about the scoring.  The game's Progress screen records not only which songs you've played, but which ones you've scored over 10,000 points.  Each song is highlighted by a yellow border.  When playing, your scoring bar "breaks" when you've cracked that magical milestone.  Naturally, I'm competitive enough to want to crack the high score on all 32 songs.

Did I also mention that you get crowns when you crack 15,000?  I am not going to play The Beach Boys or Gorillaz that far.  No bloody chance.

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